YOU CANNOT ESCAPE - I made sure of that. Solve puzzles, gather clues, don’t crawl into ventilation shafts, and realize how trapped you are in this comedy-horror escape room, my magnum opus.
We are not affiliated with IsThereAnyDeal.
The perfect escape room.
You will never escape it because there is no escape. It is essentially the only escape room you will ever need to play, because you can practically play it forever without getting anywhere.
Every puzzle in my masterpiece is a work of genius (my genius, of course) that will have you scratching your tiny little head, desperately trying to make sense of a world far too complex for your limited intellect. You will have to think outside the box - but, uh, we both know that's not going to happen.
As you flail helplessly, I’ll be right there with you, offering my expert guidance over the intercoms, reminding you just how utterly trapped you are.
My velvety, intellectual voice will caress your ears, a rare treat in itself, truly worth the price of admission (which, by the way, happens to be your very soul).
If you hear any other voices, then it must be something with your head and not someone in the walls.
These little critters are everywhere. No matter how hard I try, they keep sneaking in. If you see one, by all means, squash it—though I doubt you’ll even manage that. But please, for the love of my genius, don’t pick them up and try to have a conversation. They’re not interested in your nonsense.
Go ahead, drink all the coffee your weak little heart desires. You’ll need it. I’ve generously provided an endless supply, so you can keep trying (and failing) over and over again to escape. Oh, and if you happen to find any of my cups or mugs lying around, be a dear and bring them back to me.
Each and every puzzle in Escapen't is a masterpiece of complexity, designed to keep you entertained (or hopelessly frustrated) for all eternity. I have crafted these ingenious challenges to make sure your fun (or misery) never ends.
You’ll keep going in circles, but don’t worry—I’m having the time of my life watching you flounder. Fun forever? Maybe for me. For you? Good luck.
Steam data © 2025 Valve Corporation. Steam and the Steam logo are trademarks and/or registered trademarks of Valve Corporation in the U.S. and/or other countries. Independent of Valve. Pricing and availability subject to change.
The perfect escape room.
You will never escape it because there is no escape. It is essentially the only escape room you will ever need to play, because you can practically play it forever without getting anywhere.
Every puzzle in my masterpiece is a work of genius (my genius, of course) that will have you scratching your tiny little head, desperately trying to make sense of a world far too complex for your limited intellect. You will have to think outside the box - but, uh, we both know that's not going to happen.
As you flail helplessly, I’ll be right there with you, offering my expert guidance over the intercoms, reminding you just how utterly trapped you are.
My velvety, intellectual voice will caress your ears, a rare treat in itself, truly worth the price of admission (which, by the way, happens to be your very soul).
If you hear any other voices, then it must be something with your head and not someone in the walls.
These little critters are everywhere. No matter how hard I try, they keep sneaking in. If you see one, by all means, squash it—though I doubt you’ll even manage that. But please, for the love of my genius, don’t pick them up and try to have a conversation. They’re not interested in your nonsense.
Go ahead, drink all the coffee your weak little heart desires. You’ll need it. I’ve generously provided an endless supply, so you can keep trying (and failing) over and over again to escape. Oh, and if you happen to find any of my cups or mugs lying around, be a dear and bring them back to me.
Each and every puzzle in Escapen't is a masterpiece of complexity, designed to keep you entertained (or hopelessly frustrated) for all eternity. I have crafted these ingenious challenges to make sure your fun (or misery) never ends.
You’ll keep going in circles, but don’t worry—I’m having the time of my life watching you flounder. Fun forever? Maybe for me. For you? Good luck.
YOU CANNOT ESCAPE - I made sure of that. Solve puzzles, gather clues, don’t crawl into ventilation shafts, and realize how trapped you are in this comedy-horror escape room, my magnum opus.
We are not affiliated with IsThereAnyDeal.
Steam data © 2025 Valve Corporation. Steam and the Steam logo are trademarks and/or registered trademarks of Valve Corporation in the U.S. and/or other countries. Independent of Valve. Pricing and availability subject to change.
